Curious Creation

"Life causes us to ask questions" is a phrase I've been hearing in my mind over the past few weeks. So much, that I even stopped what I was doing, at one point, to write it down and move it from a thought in my mind to a physical representation on paper. [This sort of journaling practice creates space for/ invites and allows the next right thought to come forward]

I didn't disagree with the statement. It resonated deeply.

"So", I asked myself, "What question/s are coming up for me?" And that, my friends, that question coming from a place of genuine curiosity [frequency of genuine curiosity] created a portal into the next level of expansion for me. By asking the question I released perceptions of how things "should" be and opened space for the unfolding, the creation, of what is and is to come.

At the time I was awaiting the results of a heart rhythm study captured by a Zio Patch Monitor that I'd worn for 7 days. After years of episodes of "heart squiggles", "palpitations", and "sensations of worms crawling in my heart area", the symptoms had/have worsened to the point of "taking my breath away" and causing me to cough; usually several times a day. Things came to a head in early November (2024) when I woke up with a stiff neck/shoulder. As I worked in my office that day the combination of heart squiggles, cough (just short episodes of one or two coughs), and left shoulder/neck pain caused me to ask the question, "What is going on?", "Could I be having a heart attack?"

I called my friend in the emergency department (ED) and asked if they were busy. My logical mind kept reminding me that I'd "slept wrong" and that painful symptom had nothing to do with my heart. Based on my friend's response I opted not to visit the ED and instead made an appointment with my chiropractor for later that afternoon. The visit helped relieve the neck and shoulder discomfort and the entire experience left me knowing that it was time to see a doctor about the heart squiggles and cough.

This is where I mention to you, dear reader, that this would not be the first time I've visited a medical professional about the heart squiggles. On a Christmas Eve day about six years ago I visited an ED for the squiggles and some discomfort in my heart/chest area. I felt anxious at the time, as well, which is a natural human fear response. In the ED they found nothing wrong with me, told me the discomfort was likely musculoskeletal - not cardiac, and discharged me.

I recall another episode during the height of covid where I was experiencing heightened symptoms that became unbearable as my husband and I waited in our care, in line with others in their cars, to obtain a drive-thru covid test. After waiting in line for over 45 minutes, now being the 15th or so car in line, my heart was racing and I was feeling very anxious. I did not have a personal pulse oximeter at that time and wondered what my oxygen level was. I asked my husband to drive me to the ED.

During that visit to the ED the covid test came back negative and although my O2 ats were stable my heart rate was in the 140's. All other vital signs were normal. They shared their plan to discharge me and when I asked why my heart rate was so high, even though I wasn't active and in fact feeling drained, they explained that it was likely from feeling anxious. For the second time, I left the ED feeling foolish and embarrassed.

There is a third experience I had, during a routine office check-up, where I raised the concern of my symptoms to the provider and they attributed it to musculoskeletal and referred me to physical therapy.

That history of dismissals is the reason why I hesitated to visit my friends ED, that day in November, and the precursor to this video I created, but had not posted until now (video to the right), resolving to see a provider and not leave until I had answers.

As it turns out, the provider I saw was extremely caring and attentive to my concerns. She ordered and completed a 12-lead EKG right there in the exam room, obtained labs, and ordered a Zio Patch that I was to wear for 7 days. Life caused me to reach out and seek answers.

And, this video takes the story from there... Enjoy the expansion, my friends! ✨️